Question: “My husband is jealous of an old boyfriend who has found me through my Facebook network. I have reconnected with a lot of high school friends and am now planning a high school reunion for the summer. He is adamant about closing down my Facebook page. I have done nothing wrong. I have never been able to attend a reunion with my classmates due to our relocation years ago. Is it wrong of me to persist with my plans?”
Answer: Hats off to your husband for being vigilant. I applaud you both for having a no-secret-password policy in your home. It is the mark of a strong marriage. I have every reason to believe you want it to remain as such.
Your husband’s jealousy speaks of his love for you. Unless he has displayed some controlling behavior, undue anger, or overt jealousy in the past, I wouldn’t be too hard over his reaction regarding this. Many marriage breakups occur over the most innocent and random encounters. Now, take a deep breath, open your mind, strap in your heart for compromise, and know that everything will be all right. The reunion should be a way for the two of you to work through this if you both manage to remove self from the scenario and think about pleasing one another.
Hopefully, he will realize there is no reason for the jealousy. If there has been no misconduct on your part, he has no ground on which to stand. Some honest, tender reassurance should go a long way, given there is no past history to warrant suspicion and he is a man who loves with an abundance of trust.
As for closing out your Facebook page, this is something you will have to reconcile between the two of you. Perhaps agreeing to close it down after the reunion might be an alternative. Invite him to sit with you while you plan with your classmates on FB. I understand how socially fulfilling this online network has become for many people. However, you will need to discern which is more important: your social outlet with friends or your marriage.
I have found when people invest the time spent on social networking and shift it to their spouse/family, their need for online connections wanes. At day’s end, it’s a better investment.